It's not hard to reason this one but you migh...
Dennis Rodman’s Tattoos
A woman is picked up by Dennis Rodman in a bar. They like each other and she goes back with him to his hotel room. He removes his shirt, revealing all his tattoos and she sees one on his arm that says, "Reebok". She thinks that's a bit odd and asks him about it.
Dennis says, "When I play basketball, the cameras pick up the tattoo and Reebok pays me for the advertisement." A bit later, his pants are off and she sees "Puma" tattooed on his leg. He gives the same explanation for the unusual tattoo.
Finally, the underwear comes off and she sees the word "AIDS" tattooed on his manhood. She jumps back with shock. "I'm not going to do it with a guy who has AIDS!" He says, "It's cool baby, in a minute it's going to say 'ADIDAS'."
Mike vs. Magic
One night after a big fight, Mike Tyson was a bit depressed so he decided to get a prostitute to cheer him up. After the act, they were laying in bed having a smoke. The prostitute said, "Well Mike, how's it all going?"
"How's it all going?" he asked. "My life's a disaster. I was born to an underprivileged family, had a hard upbringing, was thrown in jail for rape, now I'm on parole and I've hit a cop, my wife left me for beating her up, I have to pay maintenance for my kids, I've lost two world title fights, I've disgraced myself and my sport, most people want me banned me for life and they won't pay me my money. Nothing could make my life any worse."
"Oh, that's so sad," the prostitute said. "I'll say one thing to cheer you up. You're a much better lover than Magic Johnson!" [Magic Johnson is famous for publicly revealing that he has HIV/AIDS]
Britney’s Alligator Pumps
Britney Spears was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, Britney shouted, “Maybe I’ll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes!”
The shopkeeper said, “By all means, be my guest. Maybe you’ll luck out and catch yourself a big one!”
Determined, Britney turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots Britney spears standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank.
Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then Britney spears flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, “Damn it, this one isn’t wearing any shoes either!”
Shania, Shaggy and Britney At the Movies
One night Shania Twain, Shaggy, and Britney Spears all went to the movies. All of a sudden, some one farted.
Shania said: "Up up up; there's no way but up from here."
Shaggy said: "Wasn't me."
Britney said: "Oops I did it again."
The next night they went to the movies again and once again someone farted.
Shania said: "Up up up there’s no way but up from here."
Shaggy said: "Wasn't me."
Britney said: "Stronger than yesterday."
Shaggy later left to go to the washroom and Britney entered the male washroom as he did. He then turned around and asked what she was doing there and she said: "I'm not a girl not yet a woman."
Paris and Lindsay
Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are driving down a highway in a convertible. Lindsay knows that she’s speeding, so she asks Paris if there’s a cop behind them.
Paris looks behind her and sees a cop and says “Oh shit. There is a cop behind us.”
Lindsay says “That sucks. Are his 'pull-over lights' on?"
Paris says “Yes…No…Yes…No…Yes…No”
-Pictures courtesy Reuters and guardian.co.uk-
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