It's not hard to reason this one but you migh...
The Definition of Politics
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"
Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And, your baby brother, we'll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper.
So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny.
He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."
The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."
The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep sh*t."
Prime Minister Laloo
Laloo becomes PM and goes to Pakistan for a one-on-one with Asif Zardari. They decide to meet without any aides and are closeted for in a conference room for about 5 minutes.
Laloo then emerges from the room. Reporters clamour for a statement. "Zardaribhai will make the announcement" is all Laloo says.
Asif Zardari comes out and drops a bombshell, "Pakistan has decided to give up all claims on Kashmir, with no strings attached!"
The world is stunned. Laloo has achieved in 5 minutes what others had failed to do in over 60 years!
"How did you do it, what did you promise," the press clamours.
"It’s all because of those ads I saw on TV,” says Laloo. " They give fridge free if you buy TV, cellphone free if you buy washing machine. So, I said to Zardaribhai, 'You want Kashmir, right? Take it. But you will get Bihar free also!'"
Insane on a Train
George Bush, Sonia Gandhi, Manmohan Singh and Aishwarya Rai are in the same carriage on a train. The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and Manmohan are sitting there looking perplexed.
Bush is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.
Sonia is thinking, "These Americans are all crazy after Aishwarya. Bush must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him."
Aishwarya is thinking, "Bush must have tried to kiss me but kissed Sonia instead and got slapped."
Bush is thinking, "Damn it. Manmohan must have tried to kiss Aishwarya. She might have thought it was me and slapped me."
Manmohan is thinking, "If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap Bush again!"
Tea with Kalam
While visiting India, George Bush is invited for tea with Abdul Kalam. He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is. He replies that it is to surround himself with intelligent people. Bush asks how he knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says Kalam. "Allow me to demonstrate."
Bush watches as Kalam phones Manmohan Singh and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Manmohan immediately responds, "It's me, Sir !"
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Kalam.
He hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"
Bush nods, "Yes Mr. President. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Condoleeza Rice to the test.
Bush summons her to the White House and says, "Condoleeza, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."
"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"
Bush poses the question, "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Rice was puzzled and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Rice leaves.
Rice immediately calls a meeting of senior staff, and they mull over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Rice calls Colin Powell and explains the problem.
"Mr. Powell, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?" Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."
Much relieved, Rice rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"
And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, its Manmohan Singh!"
Mayawati came to Laloo's house with a goat.
Laloo: Why have you got a bull?
Maya: Can’t you see it’s a goat?
Laloo: I was asking the goat!
An Indian politician went to the US to visit one of his counterparts. When the American senator invited him home for dinner, the minister was very impressed by the lavish mansion, grounds and the costly furniture.
He asked "How can you afford all this on a meagre senator's salary?"
The senator smiled knowingly and took him to the window. "Can you see the river?"
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
"Of course", said the minister.
"10 percent", said the senator smugly.
Some time later, he paid a return visit. The Indian minister lavished his hospitality on him. When he came to his house, the American was stunned by the huge palace the minister had built.
"How can you possibly afford this, on your salary?", he asked.
The minister called him to the window. "See the river over there?"
"Sure", cried the senator.
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
The senator looked, was confused, peered closely and said, "No, I don't see any bridge."
"100 percent", said the minister !!
-Pictures courtesy Thinkstock-
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